thanks for the nice comments, everyone. hehe <3
only one chapter left now! so this one is quite long, as it leads up to the last one. :0
CHAPTER 11: Far away from the ordinaryAmanda snapped out of it and tried to relax the thundering pulse in her throat.
She exhaled and scrambled together his stuff, shooting forward to throw the bag back where it was originally placed. About to get up on her feet in the bed, the rushed movements made her dizzy. It resulted in her stumbling at the edge and eventually falling over, knocking a table over her as she went down.
Lennard watched, but wasn't quick enough to actually understand what on earth that girl was doing. He had been too absorbed in his own mind, feeling his heart still pound in his chest.
He put the pizzabox away and kneeled down on the floor.
"Are you okay?" he said, sounding like he was stiffling a laugh.
Amanda was pushing the table off her chest and picked up a leather folder with the motel's name on it. "yeah" she drawled as she leaned over the small table, skimming through the folder. It had some brochoures and time schedules in it. She put it away and turned around to face him.
Lennard stared at her face, "I think that folder knicked you" he said, giving it a qucik glance. It had metal tips on the edges to keep them from being bent.
His attention was back to Amanda, who was waiting for him to continue. Lennard carefully pressed his thumb a bit above her eyebrow, pulling it up a bit to see more of the knick. "yeah, it got you." he said with a hint of amusement in his voice.
Amanda quickly touched it and winced. There were a few seconds of silence before she laughed cheekily. He must think she was so silly. Or crazy. Maybe both. Having him sit next to her by the bed made her mind run wild. She wanted so badly to touch him. To feel his skin, his heat and his breath. But she didn't dare. She didn't want to be rejected. She was sure that since he knew so much about her, he would not want her.
Not to mention how she looked. Who would want someone like her? Someone who looked like her? Not a beautiful man like Lennard. A man so pretty needed someone who was equally goodlooking.
Now she suddenly felt like she didn't want to talk to him. Why bother when she had no chance anyway?
Lennard could sense that she seemed to pull away. He wondered what was bothering her. She was indeed an odd one, this girl.
Nosing his t shirt like a bloodhound. The thought almost made him smile.
It was a peculiar feeling that swept over him. He felt flattered for some reason and thinking about it made his head spin. That image of her sitting there, rummaging through his stuff like a raccoon, caught redhanded. All his stuff had been touched, felt, eyed, smelled. It wasn't just inspected, but it had been hungrily tackled by a curious, menacing girl.
"Where did that pizza go?" Amanda said with a wheezing exhale, and crept up on the bed again, heading over to the lonely pizza box. Lennard got up from the floor, joining her.
***
Amanda lay flat out on the bed. The pizza was long gone, and now she was watching Lennard move about in the small motelroom.
"Sorry I didn't get us seperate rooms. There's some sort of happening these next three days, so this was all that was vacant" he spoke mindlessly as he folded the pizzabox, looking for a trashcan.
It was as if he didn't know where to rest without being too close to her. Having spent so much time in the car together, she could not understand why this was an issue. Maybe he had some sort of guilt hanging over him. That reminded her, - she wanted to find out about that picture.
"Who sent you after me?" Amanda asked boldly, yet trying to sound casual. She failed. However, Lennard was pretty sure she would ask sooner or later. He turned around, looking at her. His hands resten lazily on his narrow hips. Lennard started with a strained sigh, "your uncle." he stated and went to sit down on the bed. He faced her, sitting at the end of the bed. Amanda sat up, staring at him, waiting for more.
"I owed your uncle a favour. He believed you were making a mistake. " the man explained slowly.
Amanda was quiet. She was afraid she'd bombard him with both anger and questions if she opened her mouth.
"My uncle? What about my parents? What did they say?" she asked, leaning forward and closer to him.
Lennard was not going to lie, "I didn't hear anything from them. I got a photograph of you from your uncle, and I was told where you would most likely go." Lennard paused.
"I'm sure they are worried." He added.
Amanda looked baffled, but at the same time angry. Angry cause only one person had actually cared that she was gone. Or atleast cared enough to do something about it. Not that it mattered, though, but it still hurt.
"Did you really drug me?" Amanda thought she might aswell find out, now that she was on a roll. Lennard nodded, "it was only to make sure you were calm enough to not freak out. The timing wasn't perfect, I'm afraid." It felt odd to tell her everything now, as if everything was over. He didn't know how to deal with this, but he needed to figure this out soon. Should he still take her back home?
Now Amanda frowned. She was still a bit cross for being drugged. It had scared her more than anything.
"I can't believe you actually drugged me. Did you know how confused I was? It was awful. I felt helpless and panicked. God, there's a reason it's illegal" there was a frustrated hiss in her voice. "Why did you take me here anyway? What changed your mind?" she asked, tilting her head. Lennard gave a weak smile, "I wanted to give you a fair chance. I hope you will re-think your choices"
There was a change in Amanda's face. It was like a horrible feeling crept over her, a dark cloud casting a shadow over her. She looked away and let her body fall back on the bed again.
"I'm not going back, I won't. I've come so far, and I wont give it all up." she mumbled with a laboured breath. "Why does everything I do have to be so hard? Whenever I want something, I always have to go through hell to get it. Nothing works out easily." she hissed with a bitter voice, curling her arms around the pillow.
"Amanda" Lennard drawled slowly, wanting to tell her he was sorry she was so unlucky.
Amanda looked up at him, "could you come lay next to me?" she whispered, letting go of her pillow. Lennard wasn't sure how he should respond, but he could tell when a person needed someone to comfort them, and he could see she needed someone to care. He smiled and came leaning down next to her. She had turned around and now they were face to face.
She felt her heartbeat race with excitement as she was so close to him. She wanted to touch him, smell him, kiss him. She wanted it all, but she was afraid he'd stop her. He wasn't like those sleezy men back home. They didn't really care about her. All they wanted was someone to do whatever they paid for. They didn't care if it was her or anyone else. Lennard, however, was a kind man who could pick anyone he liked. Why would he pick her? Or even let her touch him.
Before she had managed to think twice, though, her hand was on his chest. She fidgeted with his shirt, twisting it between her fingertips. Lennard froze. He didn't want to move, for the same reason you didn't move when a wild bird was eating out of your hand.
Amanda pulled herself closer to him. She could feel his shirt grace her forehead and part of her cheek. His warm breath gently passing her hair. She wanted to cry, to press herself against him and cry, but she couldn't force herselt to. Instead, there was a a desperation consuming her, and she wanted him to save her from it.
Lennard felt his pulse reverberate in his head. He wasn't sure what she wanted, or what he should make of this, but he could tell there was something she wanted. Something she wanted him to do.
"You're so beautiful" she stammered, almost muffled by his chest.
She finally said it. Lennard held his breath, looking up at the window infont of him. He finally put his arm around her, squeesing her close to him.
It pleased her more than anything had done for as long as she could remember. Her troubles seemed far away now, and his arm would shield her from anything.
This man had tricked and drugged her, but right now his embrace was the safest place she could ever be. "Don't underestimate your strenght" Lennard said quitely, still holding her tight.
Amanda sighed, pressing her lips against his shirt, feeling how Lennard slowly rolled over on his back, pulling her with him him. She lay halfways over him, still clinging to him.
She closed her eyes, feeling his chest heaving under her as she rested her hand over his arm, gently gripping it to feel his muscles. His other arm across her back, it's weight feeling like it had her pinned down. Usually she would have a claustrophobic panick attack, but right now it felt good.
***
Amanda suddenly opened her eyes. She had not realized that she had closed them, but as she lay there a few seconds, she came to slowly remember that she had gone to sleep.
Outside it looked completely different. There was a pink, peachy colour outside. Like a vague, distant sunrise. Next to her was Lennard. He had his back against her, but there was barely an inch between them.
She could feel the heat of his body as she got up and slowly leaned over him. She carefully twisted his arm, checking his wristwatch. It showed around 7.30 am.
She slipped out of bed and stumbled out on the floor.
What on earth was she going to do?
She had a feeling he would force her back, or tell her things she did not want to hear. She didn't want to hear how people at home might miss her and such. She needed to do this.
She walked over to the bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror. She felt like there was a stranger staring back at her.
A strange girl with a wicked look in her eye. A look that promised she would take advantage of you, only to vanish afterwards. Amanda knew better.
That wasn't her.
The girl staring at her in the mirror, was her and only her. It was silly Amanda who smelled pretty men's clothes and drank beverages through colourful straws. It was the girl with twisted bracelets around her wrist.
She found herself standing infront of the bed, trying to figure out what to do. She needed to leave. But she didn't want to. Or, she did, but she didn't want to leave him. She didn't want him to leave her. She had to get out before he woke up.
Rather that than having him trick her again. She could not stand being tricked like that. It made her feel stupid and defeated.
She would not have that!
Amanda rushed over to the table where the folder stood. She grabbed the time schedule. It listed some ferries and when they arrived and left. There was one leaving at nine am.
Amanda stared at Lennard. He was completely gone in his dreams. His face emotionless, his long, dark eyelashes fluttering against his skin from time to time.
Amanda tossed the folder aside, almost stumbling over his bag. On top of it was a t-shirt. The one she had toyed with. She picked it up again, staring at it. A few seconds passed, and Amanda rushed out the door. The t-shirt still in her hand.