Post by mrkite23 on Aug 30, 2019 8:31:13 GMT 12
" So where is Mr Kite ? " Asked Colin
" I think you better come inside " said the old woman .
They both followed the woman into the kitchen and she put the kettle on
"Sit yourself down , I`ll make you a tea and I`ll give you the answers you are looking for "
She placed two mugs on the table and popped tea bags into them
"Sugar ?"
"I`m good thank you " said Colin " Are you not having a drink ?"
She sat down at the top of the table and gave Colin a strange look
"So can we speak to Mr Kite " said Colin
He`s not here " said the old woman
She got up and got the kettle and filled the two mugs and sat back down again " When you took the Shed ..It was 2001 was`nt it , you changed everything the time lines everything was changed the people you affected was changed and even some people who should`nt have been here in the first place got stuck here! "
"We only took it about ..Ten minutes ago now " said Colin looking at his watch .
"I`m afraid its a little bit longer than that, you`ve been traveling for thirty years , the year now is 2031 " The woman picked up a jug off the table " Milk ?"
Both of her visitors were both looking at each other opened mouthed
Then Colin finally spoke
"No,no madame we got into the Shed and we set the machine a year ahead and here we are and it`s 2002 is`nt it ?!"
"So it`s not been thirty years or any years , we`ve come here in the same night " said Walter
"I wish you had come straight here but you have been gone for such a long time , I was thirty three years old when you took the Shed and I`ve been here waiting for you to come back if at all and you can see my body does`nt lie "
" And you are ?" asked Colin
"My name is Lana " she replied " I`m a Russian Astronaut , when you took the Shed I was stranded here I`m from your future ..Well I was.."
"But I swear , we really hav n`t been gone that long it`s impossible , I`m sure I`d remember my last thirty years !" said Walter .
" You are the only person apart from Eric that has been in the Shed for such a long space of time and when you start traveling at such an amount of time , you start to loose your sense of time and space and it effects you so much that it just becomes all instant memory , you wont remember what you did in the past or what you did in the future , you brain can`t handle it , it`s not meant to be thrown into a quantum realm "
Colin just looked at the woman and then laughed
"OK , miss , your bit of fun has gone on long enough, just get us Mr Kite and let us get back to 2001 and we promise we wont tell anyone about the Shed " Said Colin
I wish I was joking , I`ve been stuck here half of my lifetime and I had to work for a living I had to work at Patricia`s his and her`s hair dressers washing hair day in day out and it`s not been a fun occupation for someone who is a qualified class A astronaut "
" I`m sorry miss , but it`s a bit difficult to believe we don`t remember anything "
"You probably did come here a year later , but something happened where you did`nt come to the house , something made you go back into the Shed and just try to go somewhere else and just to see if it works and maybe you stepped on a snail in the garden , anything that changed the timeline or even you maybe saw or spoke to someone ?"
"A phone call ?" said Colin
"Anything , you need to go back to that night and walk away from the Shed " said Lana "That night Kite had come back for help and had me and his friend Harry waiting to save a dear friend , his name is Albert so it really is a matter of life and death "
you keep saying we was there someone else with you ?
"Yes, it`s Walter "
"And he was with you that night you went in the Shed ?"
"Yes , Yes he was and his Pigeon "
" And where is he now ?"
"He`s here at the side of me right now , can`t you see him ?! "
"Can you talk to him ?"
" Walter , what has happening to you , why can`t this woman see you ?"
A minute silence ..
"What did he say ?"
"Have you got the greater Manchester Racing Pigeon monthly "
" Ask him if he remembers what happened the night you went in the Shed ?"
A few minutes silence and then Colin put his head in his hands
"What ?!" said Lana .
"He says he thinks he died "
"What makes him think that ?"
"He sees dead people "
" Can he describe his surroundings"
"He says he`s in a Cemetery "
He seems to be completely covered in black dust ! .
"Walter!, he`s going very faint ..He`s gone !"
There was noise from outside and it sounded like someone was very happy and then through the front door came an old man dressed from head to foot in Denim and trainers
" The Sheds back ! " he cried and ran over and hugged the woman
" Who s this " Colin asked
" I`m Kite " the old man replied
"And who are you ?, I`m guessing you have something to do with the Shed being returned "
"I`m Colin ..Colin Plint . I thought you was`nt here !"
"Well obviously I was`nt I`ve been to the Cinema complex to watch Terminator XII in 5 D "
"He`s the one who took the Shed " said Lana
"We`ll said Kite , I guess twenty or so years ago I would have throttled you , but I seem to have accepted that the Shed was never coming back "
"I`m so sorry , I never meant to cause any trouble, all I can remember is that we were just in it for a few minutes and came here , and what we thought was just a year in the future " said Colin
"We`ll your in the year 2031 and you say we "
"Yes I was with Walter , and I could have sworn he was with me , but now he`s disappeared into thin air ! "
"Get a mirror from the draw Lana " said Kite
She went to the draw and got out a mirror and gave it to Kite
"This may be a bit of a shock Colin , so just brace your self "and then Kite put the mirror in front of Colin .
Colin looked in the mirror and saw a face unrecognizable from the one he left his home tonight he was dressed in clothing that would look perfect in a John Waterhouse painting and he had a long hair and a beard
" Christ !" he said .
"You know now that you have been away a very long time , much to long for anybody to handle Time traveling for such a long time as you have and we need to find out what happened to your friend "
"Walter " said Colin " And Walter the Pigeon "
"Walter Pigeon" Said Kite
"The 16th " Said Colin and took a sip of tea
" What we need to do is ring Harry in the morning , and he`ll put you under a hypnosis and we`ll get to the bottom of what happened to you and then we need to figure out how to sort this mess out and then we need to go and rescue Albert " ..Again.
Colin slept on the couch that night wishing he`d been a Railway signal man just like his dad , nothing ever exciting ever happened to his Dad and to think of it , nothing ever happened to him up until tonight , Colin really had a dull life but it seems that where he had been for the last thirty years was far from it .
The Diary of Colin Plint prt 1 .
Colin was a bit of a loner , he lived with his Mother up to a few years ago when she passed away , his Father died when he was in his teenage years and his Father was a bit of a distant memory and he soon only remembered the stories of his dad when he was a Railway signal man on the Stalybridge line
He was in box two on the Huddersfield line and apart from switching the lines now and again it was a very dull job and when you sit in a box all day on your own five days a week with weekends on a fortnight rota , Coiln`s dad had less contact with the human population than Papillon in solitary
Maybe this life style and the fact he was`nt a mixer was passed down in his genes to Colin
How his Dad met his mother was a complete mystery and one Coiln would never find out , he had his own Ideas that maybe his mother was going to Huddersfield one day and bumped into his dad and she just liked a man in a uniform and that was it .
They got married and had Colin
Colin had a job , the only job he ever had , he worked for the Council and he had his own little office and he got the bus to work.
He would get the same Bus every day and if another Bus would come along , he`d wave it on , he would`nt chance getting another Bus , who knows what might happen
Colin did`nt like adventure even on a low scale of getting a different Bus
The drama of getting another Bus would have him in hot sweats , the drama of it was to much to bare .
The people at the Bus stop would would have to suffer his antidotes about mindless things that would make a glass eye go to sleep
His favorite was that Pluto was no longer a planet and that it was now a dwarf planet , which is a planet but not one of ours ..How he laughed
One newbie made the mistake by asking if the Planet was named after Mickey Mouse`s dog
The newbie was never seen again , people say he emigrated to Australia
People would walk a mile to the next bus stop to avoid him , one woman packed her job in just not to catch the same bus .
At work he would tell the tale of his father when he found out the The Flying Scotsman was coming through the Stalybridge line and right past his Dad`s signal box and that his father spent hours cleaning his Signal box , washed the windows , swept the stairs , touched up the fading paint work masked up all the numbers so the paint would`nt run on the Signal box number which was STY 23
HE polished all his levers and then he sat down in his box and went to sleep and as he slept the Scotsman flew passed in all its glory and it`s said that Bridgites wept that it was such a sight that the smoke billowed almost seemed like angels were flying over the railway line
The guest of honor of the day was Gilbert Clutterbuck who was the second oldest lollipop man in Great Britain and he was only 23 days away of becoming the oldest Lollipop man in great Britain but he was on duty on that terrible day
He walked in the road to help an old lady to get across the road but an approaching car was struck by blood and feathers and that was the end of Gilbert
There was also a brass band .
Colin`s dad missed it .
People would pore coffee over them selves , just not to hear the story and escape the grip of Colin
He told the story almost every day
Colin did really wished he`d followed his Fathers foot steps
The one thing that Colin did bless his Father for was his incredible Blues record collection and his really old Robert Johnson records
Colin always wished he could play the blues .
Then came along the Internet
All the knowledge he`d built up over the years of unexplained , the solar system , UFO sightings and of course that one thing that drew him even deeper into the strange world of things not quite right in the history and that was the Shed
Colin was awoken by Lana and she handed him a cup of tea and some toast
"We`ve rang Harry , he`ll be round in a while he`s dying to meet you , he loves a good hypnotism
Half an hour later Harry was let in
"Alright Kite , got any new albums ?"
"Have you brought the one you lent off me the last time ?"
"I hav`nt had chance to play it , it`s on my to do list "
"No , I hav`nt, to do list , your retired "
"Ah that`s true , OK where`s the patient ?"
" He`s over there on the Sofa "
"Jesus , where the hell as he been at a period drama convention ?"
" That`s what we need to find out " said Kite
" Alright mate , just lie back and watch the watch and slowly count to ten and then close your eyes "
"Your kidding right said Coiln , that only works in corny old movies there is no way I`m going to be hypnotized as easy as that "
" Well just appease me , wont you " said Harry getting out his watch
"OK , but it`s pointless , I`m not going under that easy "
By the time Colin got to five , he was out of it
"OK Kite he`s all yours "
"OK Colin can you go back to when you entered the Shed "
The Diary of Colin Plint Prt. 2 ( Sometime in the 18th Century )
Colin and Walter set the Console and came out of the Shed in 2002
They made the phone call and then they realized that they would be repercussions that they have got in contact with the future when they have come from the past and to top it all off Walter stood on a snail
"Bread and butter effect ?" said Walter .
Colin just knew that in his heart that even when he was presented with an opportunity to change his dull life and his dull job that it was just going to go wrong and he resided to the fact that they best just go back to 2001 and walk away
But once they got in the Shed he just thought that one chance that he could meet the legend Robert Johnson and be there when he sells his sole to the Devil at the crossroads and maybe just maybe show him how to tune his guitar that sounded as though it was from the Devils very soul .
So he typed in Robert Johnson : Dockery Mississippi Crossroads .
He forgot the date .
The Shed had other ideas for Colin and Walter
They both stepped out of the Shed and they started to sink into the ground .
They waded as much as they could until they were out of the bog and then both turned round
The Shed was sinking , and it slowly sank until there was nothing except the roof
Then it then slowly started to sink again and then it was gone completely .
"Oh hell" said Colin
Then they both heard lots of shouting and cheering
At the top of the hill was a Gallows with a crowd around and they could just make out three lifeless bodies swinging for the end of ropes .
Then they turned to find themselves at a crossroads and it was`nt Robert Johnson on one knee it was a crowd of people
"Witches !" they cried
"I think we should run " said Walter
"I`m covered head to foot in Bog I don`t think I`m going to break any world records
I`ll talk our way out of this one "
"Good luck !" And Walter set off like a baby had just discovered how to walk and he was grabbed by two old ladies
" Hello , I`m just wondering if anyone can tell us where we are , we seem to be lost "
"Stavelegh witch " said one of the crowd
"And wheres that , and I assure you gentlemen ..And ladies , I`m not a witch and I do believe they are women and I`m not a woman ...
"You came out of that Shed that appeared from nowhere and that is witch crafty stuff , it sure is " interrupted and man at the front of the crowd which was now getting larger as people from the hill were on there way down from the hill
"What have we got here ?!" shouted a new arrival
"We got ourselves two witches and one of them is carrying a black crow in a cage , so he is a witch and I`m an expert "
Walter who was being held by the two women lifted his cage and saw that Walter was completely covered in black gunge from the bog and he was`nt a happy Pigeon
The crowd parted and a tall man in a long flowing coat and a large hat holding a very large wooden cross, he was a Witchfinder General
"They are dressed in all black and carrying a crow " said an old woman
"A carrion crow, a witches bird if you ask me" said another crowd Witch expert
Put them in the stocks and we will decide their fate tomorrow said the Holy man and the mass crowd dragged the two men up the hill and locked them both in the stocks and when they were both bolted in the old woman gave Walter his cage
"Here`s your witches bird " she said
And the crowd all left the two travelers alone on top of the hill .
"Well , that`s that then , I think we will be doing the devils dance tomorrow with a big crowd " said Walter
"Do you know where we are ?" said Colin "Take a look at the landscape , on our right is Stalybridge were on Mottram rise and down there is mately lane but , there is not a building in sight , no street lights and with the crowd we`ve just encountered they were without doubt from another century and with all the witch craft fascination I think we could be in the dark ages ."
Colin stretched his neck and tried to look down and he could make out the crossroads
"All we need now is the devil to turn up " he mumbled to himself .
The dark soon crept upon the hill and it just left the full moon in the sky to light up the faces of the men and there was an eerie silence all around them and then a noise
Walter had fallen asleep and he was snoring and the cage in his hand slowly slipped out of his fingers and fell to the ground .
Colin could not seeing a happy ending for the two of them tomorrow and even if they escaped the hangman`s noose , they still had to somehow get the Shed out of the swamp and that would be near impossible
For the first time in his not exciting life he was thinking on what could have been with the Shed , he could have seen many things and he would have had so many great stories to tell , but then in the end things never seem to go right for him and the guilt crept upon him that he had brought Walter along and the poor man will be hung tomorrow thanks to him .
Then from the darkness Colin heard a very faint voice
"You are not of this time stranger "
"Who`s there ?" replied Colin
Then in front of him slowly out of the pitch darkness was a Fox with piercing green eyes that reflected the Moon and it slowly walked up to the stocks
Colin just starred , unable to move , even though he felt a calmness as the beast just looked at him Helpless and unable to threaten the animal
And then the voice again
" You seem to be in a tricky situation and you will probably be hanged tomorrow , but I`m here to help you and tomorrow a woman will help you out and get you out of your predicament "
"Are you behind me ? , come round so I can see you , I`m stuck in this bloody thing and there is no way I can see you .."
I`m not behind you " the voice interrupted " I`m in front of you and I speak to you through telepathy , and I stand in front of you in one of my forms "
"Are you Devil ?"
The voice laughed
You think I`m an Angel of your God ? , no I`m from much further than your two thousand year old book , I`m from light years away and from the begining of Man on this planet , I`m an ancient alien "
I`m a sibling of the ancient God known as Khafre .
Colin just did`nt know how to take all this in , he was wide awake , he did`nt think he had gone over the edge and really lost his mind , but then he was on top of a hill , with a Pigeon fancier and how he got here was a common old garden shed that was now at the bottom of a swamp .
He just thought , He best just go along with what ever craziness that was going to be thrown at him tonight or any time now until he`s swinging on the gallows pole .
" I am wandering through the centuries and waiting to one day meet up with my Father who is time traveling in a machine that brought him to this planet
And I know that from your aura that you are from another time and I need to know how you got here as I`m sure there is a connection to you and my father
"I`m afraid I don`t know your father and as how I got here the thing that got me into this mess is at the bottom of the swamp
I see said the voice , then we must come to some arrangement that if I get you free you will get the machine out of the swamp .
I guess its a deal" said Colin , thinking to himself that he has made a deal with the Devil and he still will only be able three chord blues songs
"We have a deal then, you will be set free tomorrow I swear on it "
And the Fox slowly disappeared into the darkness
That same night the the Witch finder general of the town of Stavelegh was visited by a beast that was the size of a great bear and as he wrote in his diary many years later the face of the Devil himself
The creature spoke to him
The two you hold in your stocks are innocents and if you commit them to the gallows you will find your self with pleasure of my company and you will burn in hell for all eternity
He was up at the crack of dawn the next day and skipped breakfast and made his way to the stocks on his fastest steed
The next morning Colin awoke to find a small crowd and the Witch Finder in front of him .
He spoke to the crowd.
"To see if they are not Witches we shall do the an alternative to the Pricking test and we shall kick the men on trail in there groins and if they feel pain they are free to go "
The crowd all sighed as it was as sure as anything this test had never found a man to be a witch yet .
Colin did`nt know what was best plead for mercy and not have his groin tested or just pray that the Groin kicker was not big footed
Walter was first .
Walter still half asleep screamed at the sight of a tall six foot man coming towards him and then screamed some more when the test was over
"Let him free" said the Witchfinder
The tears rolled down Walters cheeks and a faint mummy was heard by the disappointed crowd
Next up was Colin
He tried to think of something nice and far away , but the pain from his kicking brought him up to speed that he was not going to think of anything but pain between his legs for a few hours
Colin screamed then winced as was also let free and he fell to the floor
The disappointed crowd began to slowly walk down the hill muttering about the groin test should never be used on men as it always ended in a early finish in the Witch hanging events
The Ye Burger cart man , decided to have a day off and locked up and went off down the hill .
Colin could have sworn it said at the back of the cart
" No dead Goats are left in the cart over night "
He must have imagined it with the pain still making his eyes water
The Witch Finder sighed in relief that he did`nt loose the faith of his followers by just letting the men go and knew that the groin test never failed .
After the men had finally come round from the groin test Walter opened Walters cage and pulled out a hankie from his pocket , licked it and started to wipe the tar off Waters wings and soon the Pigeon manged to flap his wings and make a coo to let Water know he was well enough to do his own preening .
"What next ?" asked Walter
"If we don`t get the Shed out of the swamp we are stuck here for good" said Colin who did`nt think it would be a good time to tell Walter of his conversation with a green eyed Fox .
We need to get ropes and horses and that is`nt going to be that simple , we will have to either steal them , which in these times is not a good idea as we could end up in the stocks again or find jobs and earn enough money to buy what we need
"It`s jobs then " said Walter who was`nt keen on going through another groin test any time soon
They decided they would be better off splitting up as so not to attract any more attention as they both were strangers in these parts and that they would meet at the crossroads every three days to see if they could get the Shed out of the swamp with the tools they could gather and even though it was the dark ages tools still had to be bought and jobs were not easy to come by .
Weeks turned into Months and Months turned into years as much as they tried there was no chance of getting the Shed out without at least two horses and for the poor folk , they were just seen at Kings and Queens parades .
Colin had settled down in Stavelegh and found himself to be a good roofer and became known as Colin Thatcher
He worked tirelessly through the days up on roofs and then one particular hot day a woman walked by she was carrying a pitch of water .
"Would you like a drink sire ?" she asked Coiln
Colin was already half way down his ladder , the woman had long platted blonde hair and emerald green eyes and dressed in a flowing dress of velvet green
"Yes , thank you , have I seen you before ?, I`m sure we`ve met " Colin could`nt really believe that he would forget anyone as angelic and beautiful as this woman "
"We have spoken once "
"I`m sure I would have remembered , but I see so many people in my work , I guess I must have been on a roof somewhere " Coiln drank from the Pitch and gave the woman back the cup
"Maybe so , I bid you good day " and she walked off down the road
Each day Colin would be distracted by people passing by down as he worked on the roof , hoping the woman would pass by again
He had almost finished the roof and he was for sure he would`nt see the woman again and on the last day she appeared
"How much do you charge for roofs , as mine has almost been blown away by the storm we had last night "
" Oh.., I`m very cheap ..A storm last night, was there ? .. Yes I`m cheap !"
`Well would you work on my roof then ?" she asked with a smile
"Of course , I can start right away ! ...And you are ?"
"Annora "
"Annora , I`m Colin and where is your home ?"
"I live on Matley lane , next to the Rising Moon tavern , number 23 " she said .
"See you in the morning " And Colin skipped home
It took Colin weeks to fix Annora`s roof and he would tell her not to worry about the money and he would always finish early before sunset and ask Annora if she would like to take a walk with him
They became lovers and they eventually married and Coiln was the happiest he`d ever been in his life , he had forgotten about his past or even his future life , for the first time in his life he was a contented man .
And he also completely forgotten about his meetings with Walter .
Walter had found himself in Hide (Olde Hyde )
The town was a mining area and there was always jobs for miners as was very a dangerous occupation and if it was`nt the walls caving in it was the poisonous gases down in the pits
Walter got the job as a miner as he was already equipped with his own Cannery which were used to detect the poisonous gasses albeit a Pigeon , but no one would be any wiser as most of the workers and birds would be black from head to foot with coal .
Walter turned up at the crossroads one night to find himself alone for the first time and after several weeks he gave up the long walk he had to take was shear hell when the Winter set in and he just feared that Colin may have been arrested again and hung on the Gallows
Years past by and then that day came when an accident happened in the mine and twenty three men died ( and a Pigeon ,though it was`nt reported )
Walter found himself in a graveyard , he did`nt know or even remember how he got there but the Graveyard was full of people and twenty three
fresh graves
"What`s going on here Walter " he said lifting up the cage , Walter did`nt look at all well
He walked up to a pallbearer and asked him the same question
The pallbearer seem to have not heard him and so Walter tapped him on the shoulder
His hand went straight through him
" Oh dear , I`m surrounded by ghosts !" he cried " I must be dreaming "
And he thought a slap across the face would do it , and his hand went straight through him
"Oh dear " he said
The graveyard slowly emptied and Walter was left alone with his Pigeon
the sun slowly set and the graveyard was in total darkness and then Walter thought about his last day at work
His fellow worker and neighbour on Waters Street was not feeling well as he had been sampling his new home made brew and it took a couple of pints before he decided it was drinkable
"Walter ?" he hiccuped .Could you cover for me today at the colliery I`m not feeling all to well and I need to lie down
"No problem " replied Walter and he got his coat and picked up Walter
"Thank ye sire ! , what`s the name of your Pigeon Walter ? I`ll think I`ll name my new Brew after him "
"He`s called Walter 16th " said Walter
"Walter Pigeon " said the Brewer
"Exactly that " Said Walter and he set off to the colliery
Walter then remembered he was in the mine and heard the terrible crack of the beams and the screams and total darkness
He could`nt remember getting rescued and the stark reality had sunk in
He was dead .
But he was standing in the cemetery looking at all the fresh graves and he read the temporary tombstone in front of him it read ...
Walter Pigeon R.I.P
The day Walter had died affected the timeline as he was supposed not to be in that time and not in the mine that day
The Butterfly Effect was to change things that which put the Chaos theory to it`s most chaotic as the man who should have died that day was no other than an ancestor of Mr Kite
Colin was also affected
That day of the mining disaster Colin was never the same , he became sensitive to bright light and started to see apparitions having seizures and talking about things that were from his future life of horseless cars machines that flew to different countries in a matter of hours and he would talk about that terrible day in Stalybridge and how he had to retrieve the Time Machine that was at the bottom of the swamp at Gallows Clough .
Annora was very worried and if the Witchfiders would see him in this state they would no doubt have him as demonic and surely would be carried away and hung from the gallows pole .
She decided the only thing to put things right was to get the Shed out of the swamp and so in the middle of the night she got ropes and stole two shire horses to get the Shed out of the swamp
Colin woke in the morning and found himself alone for the first time since he and Annora had been together
He instantly knew this was not like Annora not to be with him when he awoke in the morning , she was always there . Always
He got dressed and headed out and he eventually came to the crossroads and he saw a man or a apparition , he was`nt sure and he even thought he knew him
He was completely black and holding a very black cage that had inside a pile of bones .
"Quick" Said the apparition " She`s at the Gallows !" and he swung the cage and he vanished.
Colin ran for all his worth up the hill to the gallows poles and when he reached the Gallows the place was deserted except two lifeless bodies swinging from nooses and a young boy was taring them with a large brush that was as almost as big as the boy
The third noose was empty .
Colin fell to his knees and screamed
The boy stopped taring the bodies and put the brush into the tar bucket
"Are you alright sire ?" he asked
Colin looked up and the two lifeless bodies were both men
"Where is the woman ?" he asked the boy
"The Witch ?" replied
Colin wanted to strike the boy , but he controlled his anger
"Yes .. The Witch "
"It was incredible ! , in all the Witch hangings I`ve never seen anything like it , she was released from the stocks and in a flash she was gone and in her place was a Fox which bit and fought like crazy and it took five wards to restrain it and then they managed to club the creature and as it fell to the ground it had turned into a Toad !"
Colin thought of that night when he was in the Stocks of the Fox with the green eyes and a tear ran down his cheek
"Then what happened ?"
They threw the Toad into the sack and took it down to the wall of lost souls to be cemented into the wall
Colin did`nt have any more questions and the boy picked up the brush and started taring the bodies again whistling and then he began to sing
"Father did you bring me some silver
Father did you bring me some gold
What did you bring me dear father
Keep me from the gallows pole "
Colin dragged himself up off the floor and walked back down the hill and made his way to the wall of souls
It was covered in hundreds of names that had been crudely scrawled on the wall and he walked slowly along until he came to a freshly cemented part and it had a name scrawled on it
Annora Thatcher witch
Colin just looked at it and sobbed
He stood there all day and as the sun set once again behind the hills Colin heard a voice call his name
Colin looked up
"Walter !"
"It is , yes , though I`m no longer on this plain , I`m a lost soul apparently set to wander the earth for all eternity and all the other classic cliques" he chuckled "I died in a mining accident "
"I`m so sorry Walter , it`s all my fault "
"No , no don`t blame yourself , it was the Sandwhiche`s " said Walter
"My...Annora.."
"Yes , I know " said Walter "
"Do you know what happened ?"
"Yes , I have seen what happened " Replied Walter " She had gone to the swamp to get the Shed out with two horses she had stolen from a farm , but she was spotted by the Farmer who ran to get the wards
She managed to get the Shed half way out of the swamp before they found her and arrested her and put her in the stocks and ready to be hung in the morning
I went to her that night and she could see me
I told who I was and that I was from the future and we both had got stuck here
"She told she was one of the daughters of Khafre and she been wandering the Earth for centuries and she had never been so happy with you and when you became sick she hoped that if she got you into the Shed that it would cure your visions "
Colin wiped the tears from his face
"I think we best be off from this terrible place and get back to where we belong , there is no reason for me staying here any longer , my love of my life has been murdered and I guess I`ll be next, they will come for me"
"I`m a bit tired of hanging round cemeteries , there not much night life" said Walter
They went to Colin`s house and he got his block and tackle and they set off to the swamp
When they got there they could see that the Shed was almost out of the swamp on its back and the ropes were still tied around the Shed on either side .
Colin set up the pulleys from a near by tree and after an hour of blistering lifts he managed to get the Shed upright
"Well my friend , shall we go in ?" asked Colin
" I don`t think the Shed is going to be best pleased with us after leaving it in a swamp for many years " replied Walter
" It`s a Shed " said Colin "I don`t think it has a erm..a Soul "
"The Shed has apathy, you think ?"
"Lets go inside " and Colin opened the door which creaked and the they walked inside , it had a very damp smell and various creatures were wandering about on the floor
"Err..Woodlice !" said Walter
" So I think we best go to 2002 as we originally planned and go and see Mr Kite "
Colin set the machine and they both crossed their fingers
Unknown to Colin and Walter the Shed was not happy at all and as for Apathy ?!
It had been in a swamp for almost thirty years and what it really needed was a reboot and if possible a car wash that did Garden furniture
So the Shed ignored the coordin ates and went back to it`s place of being and it headed to the black hole of Cygnus
In the sixth dimension it was to the Shed like having a cosmic Sauna
It was cleansed of all the the anomalies it had come across the intense radiation , high energy protons and most importantly the woodlice , they were chewing their way through the planks of wood and this made the Shed very nervous
The treatment was OK for common all garden Shed`s , but Colin`s human brain was frying like a M1 transport cafe on a bank holiday
It was not coping to well and as for Walter he was almost forgetting the fact he was no longer alive and he was thinking when he got back he would sort out some life insurance .
But as time traveling goes it only seemed like a few minutes and they opened the Shed door and stepped into Mr Kite`s garden
"Where here !" said Colin
"Wake up Colin !!" cried Harry
Colin opened his eyes and the he uncontrollably sobbed and cried in pain
Everything that had happened to him had come back to him and he shouted out a name
"Annora !"
Lana passed him a cup of tea
They all realized that he could not go back and change things that had happened as this time around there was no Walter as he had died in that time line and the Chaos theory would be completely off its axis and the predictability would be as insane as a quote from Grouch Marks
"Time flies like a Arrow , fruit flies like a banana "
So they put there heads together and the plan was that when Colin and Walter climbed into the back garden of Kite in 2001 , Colin`s phone would ring and it would be Colin from the future , as in 2031 and he would leave himself a voice mail telling himself to not go in the Shed as it would not only end up with the death of Walter but his beautiful wife for almost thirty years at the hands of witch hunters .
He must walk away .
So Kite got in the Shed and went to 2002 and waited for Colin and Walters arrival and he sent the Voicemail to Colin`s phone and then went back to 2031 and thankfully the Shed behaved itself ( maybe because of it`s Valet and re vamp it was a happy Shed )
So that very night when Colin and Water ( and Walter ) met under the tree and climbed into the garden , Colin`s phone beeped
"What`s that !" asked Walter
"It`s a voicemail " said Colin
And he listened to it
Colin was white when he put the phone back into his pocket
"You look like you`ve seen a ghost " said Walter
" I tell you what , lets forget about all this nonsense , lets go and have a pint in the White House "
"It`s shut " said Walter " It`s gone eleven o clock "
"Tomorrow night then " Said Colin
The next night Colin and Walter and Walter the 16th met in the snug of the White House
"What will you have " said the barman
"A bitter for me " said Colin
"Have you any new real ales on ?" asked Walter
"Yes , we have it`s an old one from the 18th century , it`s called Walters Pigeon "
"We`ll knock me down with a feather " said Walter "I guess it`s that then "
Both men sat down and took a sip of their beers
" One thing I meant to ask you , was about the unexplained thing you brought up in that meeting last week "
What was that Walter ?"
" The Toad in the wall " one
" Oh , yes , it`s a strange one that , its just further up from Gallows Clough.
During the construction of the Deep Cutting in the 1800`s a stone mason split a piece of stone and he discovered an outline of a Toad in the wall.
Very mysterious indeed as their was no evidence of bones or anything to prove there was a Toad inside , it was as though it had just disappeared
" Fascinating" said Walter " Cheers Colin !"
And both men raised there glasses to the unexplained and real ales .
" I think you better come inside " said the old woman .
They both followed the woman into the kitchen and she put the kettle on
"Sit yourself down , I`ll make you a tea and I`ll give you the answers you are looking for "
She placed two mugs on the table and popped tea bags into them
"Sugar ?"
"I`m good thank you " said Colin " Are you not having a drink ?"
She sat down at the top of the table and gave Colin a strange look
"So can we speak to Mr Kite " said Colin
He`s not here " said the old woman
She got up and got the kettle and filled the two mugs and sat back down again " When you took the Shed ..It was 2001 was`nt it , you changed everything the time lines everything was changed the people you affected was changed and even some people who should`nt have been here in the first place got stuck here! "
"We only took it about ..Ten minutes ago now " said Colin looking at his watch .
"I`m afraid its a little bit longer than that, you`ve been traveling for thirty years , the year now is 2031 " The woman picked up a jug off the table " Milk ?"
Both of her visitors were both looking at each other opened mouthed
Then Colin finally spoke
"No,no madame we got into the Shed and we set the machine a year ahead and here we are and it`s 2002 is`nt it ?!"
"So it`s not been thirty years or any years , we`ve come here in the same night " said Walter
"I wish you had come straight here but you have been gone for such a long time , I was thirty three years old when you took the Shed and I`ve been here waiting for you to come back if at all and you can see my body does`nt lie "
" And you are ?" asked Colin
"My name is Lana " she replied " I`m a Russian Astronaut , when you took the Shed I was stranded here I`m from your future ..Well I was.."
"But I swear , we really hav n`t been gone that long it`s impossible , I`m sure I`d remember my last thirty years !" said Walter .
" You are the only person apart from Eric that has been in the Shed for such a long space of time and when you start traveling at such an amount of time , you start to loose your sense of time and space and it effects you so much that it just becomes all instant memory , you wont remember what you did in the past or what you did in the future , you brain can`t handle it , it`s not meant to be thrown into a quantum realm "
Colin just looked at the woman and then laughed
"OK , miss , your bit of fun has gone on long enough, just get us Mr Kite and let us get back to 2001 and we promise we wont tell anyone about the Shed " Said Colin
I wish I was joking , I`ve been stuck here half of my lifetime and I had to work for a living I had to work at Patricia`s his and her`s hair dressers washing hair day in day out and it`s not been a fun occupation for someone who is a qualified class A astronaut "
" I`m sorry miss , but it`s a bit difficult to believe we don`t remember anything "
"You probably did come here a year later , but something happened where you did`nt come to the house , something made you go back into the Shed and just try to go somewhere else and just to see if it works and maybe you stepped on a snail in the garden , anything that changed the timeline or even you maybe saw or spoke to someone ?"
"A phone call ?" said Colin
"Anything , you need to go back to that night and walk away from the Shed " said Lana "That night Kite had come back for help and had me and his friend Harry waiting to save a dear friend , his name is Albert so it really is a matter of life and death "
you keep saying we was there someone else with you ?
"Yes, it`s Walter "
"And he was with you that night you went in the Shed ?"
"Yes , Yes he was and his Pigeon "
" And where is he now ?"
"He`s here at the side of me right now , can`t you see him ?! "
"Can you talk to him ?"
" Walter , what has happening to you , why can`t this woman see you ?"
A minute silence ..
"What did he say ?"
"Have you got the greater Manchester Racing Pigeon monthly "
" Ask him if he remembers what happened the night you went in the Shed ?"
A few minutes silence and then Colin put his head in his hands
"What ?!" said Lana .
"He says he thinks he died "
"What makes him think that ?"
"He sees dead people "
" Can he describe his surroundings"
"He says he`s in a Cemetery "
He seems to be completely covered in black dust ! .
"Walter!, he`s going very faint ..He`s gone !"
There was noise from outside and it sounded like someone was very happy and then through the front door came an old man dressed from head to foot in Denim and trainers
" The Sheds back ! " he cried and ran over and hugged the woman
" Who s this " Colin asked
" I`m Kite " the old man replied
"And who are you ?, I`m guessing you have something to do with the Shed being returned "
"I`m Colin ..Colin Plint . I thought you was`nt here !"
"Well obviously I was`nt I`ve been to the Cinema complex to watch Terminator XII in 5 D "
"He`s the one who took the Shed " said Lana
"We`ll said Kite , I guess twenty or so years ago I would have throttled you , but I seem to have accepted that the Shed was never coming back "
"I`m so sorry , I never meant to cause any trouble, all I can remember is that we were just in it for a few minutes and came here , and what we thought was just a year in the future " said Colin
"We`ll your in the year 2031 and you say we "
"Yes I was with Walter , and I could have sworn he was with me , but now he`s disappeared into thin air ! "
"Get a mirror from the draw Lana " said Kite
She went to the draw and got out a mirror and gave it to Kite
"This may be a bit of a shock Colin , so just brace your self "and then Kite put the mirror in front of Colin .
Colin looked in the mirror and saw a face unrecognizable from the one he left his home tonight he was dressed in clothing that would look perfect in a John Waterhouse painting and he had a long hair and a beard
" Christ !" he said .
"You know now that you have been away a very long time , much to long for anybody to handle Time traveling for such a long time as you have and we need to find out what happened to your friend "
"Walter " said Colin " And Walter the Pigeon "
"Walter Pigeon" Said Kite
"The 16th " Said Colin and took a sip of tea
" What we need to do is ring Harry in the morning , and he`ll put you under a hypnosis and we`ll get to the bottom of what happened to you and then we need to figure out how to sort this mess out and then we need to go and rescue Albert " ..Again.
Colin slept on the couch that night wishing he`d been a Railway signal man just like his dad , nothing ever exciting ever happened to his Dad and to think of it , nothing ever happened to him up until tonight , Colin really had a dull life but it seems that where he had been for the last thirty years was far from it .
The Diary of Colin Plint prt 1 .
Colin was a bit of a loner , he lived with his Mother up to a few years ago when she passed away , his Father died when he was in his teenage years and his Father was a bit of a distant memory and he soon only remembered the stories of his dad when he was a Railway signal man on the Stalybridge line
He was in box two on the Huddersfield line and apart from switching the lines now and again it was a very dull job and when you sit in a box all day on your own five days a week with weekends on a fortnight rota , Coiln`s dad had less contact with the human population than Papillon in solitary
Maybe this life style and the fact he was`nt a mixer was passed down in his genes to Colin
How his Dad met his mother was a complete mystery and one Coiln would never find out , he had his own Ideas that maybe his mother was going to Huddersfield one day and bumped into his dad and she just liked a man in a uniform and that was it .
They got married and had Colin
Colin had a job , the only job he ever had , he worked for the Council and he had his own little office and he got the bus to work.
He would get the same Bus every day and if another Bus would come along , he`d wave it on , he would`nt chance getting another Bus , who knows what might happen
Colin did`nt like adventure even on a low scale of getting a different Bus
The drama of getting another Bus would have him in hot sweats , the drama of it was to much to bare .
The people at the Bus stop would would have to suffer his antidotes about mindless things that would make a glass eye go to sleep
His favorite was that Pluto was no longer a planet and that it was now a dwarf planet , which is a planet but not one of ours ..How he laughed
One newbie made the mistake by asking if the Planet was named after Mickey Mouse`s dog
The newbie was never seen again , people say he emigrated to Australia
People would walk a mile to the next bus stop to avoid him , one woman packed her job in just not to catch the same bus .
At work he would tell the tale of his father when he found out the The Flying Scotsman was coming through the Stalybridge line and right past his Dad`s signal box and that his father spent hours cleaning his Signal box , washed the windows , swept the stairs , touched up the fading paint work masked up all the numbers so the paint would`nt run on the Signal box number which was STY 23
HE polished all his levers and then he sat down in his box and went to sleep and as he slept the Scotsman flew passed in all its glory and it`s said that Bridgites wept that it was such a sight that the smoke billowed almost seemed like angels were flying over the railway line
The guest of honor of the day was Gilbert Clutterbuck who was the second oldest lollipop man in Great Britain and he was only 23 days away of becoming the oldest Lollipop man in great Britain but he was on duty on that terrible day
He walked in the road to help an old lady to get across the road but an approaching car was struck by blood and feathers and that was the end of Gilbert
There was also a brass band .
Colin`s dad missed it .
People would pore coffee over them selves , just not to hear the story and escape the grip of Colin
He told the story almost every day
Colin did really wished he`d followed his Fathers foot steps
The one thing that Colin did bless his Father for was his incredible Blues record collection and his really old Robert Johnson records
Colin always wished he could play the blues .
Then came along the Internet
All the knowledge he`d built up over the years of unexplained , the solar system , UFO sightings and of course that one thing that drew him even deeper into the strange world of things not quite right in the history and that was the Shed
Colin was awoken by Lana and she handed him a cup of tea and some toast
"We`ve rang Harry , he`ll be round in a while he`s dying to meet you , he loves a good hypnotism
Half an hour later Harry was let in
"Alright Kite , got any new albums ?"
"Have you brought the one you lent off me the last time ?"
"I hav`nt had chance to play it , it`s on my to do list "
"No , I hav`nt, to do list , your retired "
"Ah that`s true , OK where`s the patient ?"
" He`s over there on the Sofa "
"Jesus , where the hell as he been at a period drama convention ?"
" That`s what we need to find out " said Kite
" Alright mate , just lie back and watch the watch and slowly count to ten and then close your eyes "
"Your kidding right said Coiln , that only works in corny old movies there is no way I`m going to be hypnotized as easy as that "
" Well just appease me , wont you " said Harry getting out his watch
"OK , but it`s pointless , I`m not going under that easy "
By the time Colin got to five , he was out of it
"OK Kite he`s all yours "
"OK Colin can you go back to when you entered the Shed "
The Diary of Colin Plint Prt. 2 ( Sometime in the 18th Century )
Colin and Walter set the Console and came out of the Shed in 2002
They made the phone call and then they realized that they would be repercussions that they have got in contact with the future when they have come from the past and to top it all off Walter stood on a snail
"Bread and butter effect ?" said Walter .
Colin just knew that in his heart that even when he was presented with an opportunity to change his dull life and his dull job that it was just going to go wrong and he resided to the fact that they best just go back to 2001 and walk away
But once they got in the Shed he just thought that one chance that he could meet the legend Robert Johnson and be there when he sells his sole to the Devil at the crossroads and maybe just maybe show him how to tune his guitar that sounded as though it was from the Devils very soul .
So he typed in Robert Johnson : Dockery Mississippi Crossroads .
He forgot the date .
The Shed had other ideas for Colin and Walter
They both stepped out of the Shed and they started to sink into the ground .
They waded as much as they could until they were out of the bog and then both turned round
The Shed was sinking , and it slowly sank until there was nothing except the roof
Then it then slowly started to sink again and then it was gone completely .
"Oh hell" said Colin
Then they both heard lots of shouting and cheering
At the top of the hill was a Gallows with a crowd around and they could just make out three lifeless bodies swinging for the end of ropes .
Then they turned to find themselves at a crossroads and it was`nt Robert Johnson on one knee it was a crowd of people
"Witches !" they cried
"I think we should run " said Walter
"I`m covered head to foot in Bog I don`t think I`m going to break any world records
I`ll talk our way out of this one "
"Good luck !" And Walter set off like a baby had just discovered how to walk and he was grabbed by two old ladies
" Hello , I`m just wondering if anyone can tell us where we are , we seem to be lost "
"Stavelegh witch " said one of the crowd
"And wheres that , and I assure you gentlemen ..And ladies , I`m not a witch and I do believe they are women and I`m not a woman ...
"You came out of that Shed that appeared from nowhere and that is witch crafty stuff , it sure is " interrupted and man at the front of the crowd which was now getting larger as people from the hill were on there way down from the hill
"What have we got here ?!" shouted a new arrival
"We got ourselves two witches and one of them is carrying a black crow in a cage , so he is a witch and I`m an expert "
Walter who was being held by the two women lifted his cage and saw that Walter was completely covered in black gunge from the bog and he was`nt a happy Pigeon
The crowd parted and a tall man in a long flowing coat and a large hat holding a very large wooden cross, he was a Witchfinder General
"They are dressed in all black and carrying a crow " said an old woman
"A carrion crow, a witches bird if you ask me" said another crowd Witch expert
Put them in the stocks and we will decide their fate tomorrow said the Holy man and the mass crowd dragged the two men up the hill and locked them both in the stocks and when they were both bolted in the old woman gave Walter his cage
"Here`s your witches bird " she said
And the crowd all left the two travelers alone on top of the hill .
"Well , that`s that then , I think we will be doing the devils dance tomorrow with a big crowd " said Walter
"Do you know where we are ?" said Colin "Take a look at the landscape , on our right is Stalybridge were on Mottram rise and down there is mately lane but , there is not a building in sight , no street lights and with the crowd we`ve just encountered they were without doubt from another century and with all the witch craft fascination I think we could be in the dark ages ."
Colin stretched his neck and tried to look down and he could make out the crossroads
"All we need now is the devil to turn up " he mumbled to himself .
The dark soon crept upon the hill and it just left the full moon in the sky to light up the faces of the men and there was an eerie silence all around them and then a noise
Walter had fallen asleep and he was snoring and the cage in his hand slowly slipped out of his fingers and fell to the ground .
Colin could not seeing a happy ending for the two of them tomorrow and even if they escaped the hangman`s noose , they still had to somehow get the Shed out of the swamp and that would be near impossible
For the first time in his not exciting life he was thinking on what could have been with the Shed , he could have seen many things and he would have had so many great stories to tell , but then in the end things never seem to go right for him and the guilt crept upon him that he had brought Walter along and the poor man will be hung tomorrow thanks to him .
Then from the darkness Colin heard a very faint voice
"You are not of this time stranger "
"Who`s there ?" replied Colin
Then in front of him slowly out of the pitch darkness was a Fox with piercing green eyes that reflected the Moon and it slowly walked up to the stocks
Colin just starred , unable to move , even though he felt a calmness as the beast just looked at him Helpless and unable to threaten the animal
And then the voice again
" You seem to be in a tricky situation and you will probably be hanged tomorrow , but I`m here to help you and tomorrow a woman will help you out and get you out of your predicament "
"Are you behind me ? , come round so I can see you , I`m stuck in this bloody thing and there is no way I can see you .."
I`m not behind you " the voice interrupted " I`m in front of you and I speak to you through telepathy , and I stand in front of you in one of my forms "
"Are you Devil ?"
The voice laughed
You think I`m an Angel of your God ? , no I`m from much further than your two thousand year old book , I`m from light years away and from the begining of Man on this planet , I`m an ancient alien "
I`m a sibling of the ancient God known as Khafre .
Colin just did`nt know how to take all this in , he was wide awake , he did`nt think he had gone over the edge and really lost his mind , but then he was on top of a hill , with a Pigeon fancier and how he got here was a common old garden shed that was now at the bottom of a swamp .
He just thought , He best just go along with what ever craziness that was going to be thrown at him tonight or any time now until he`s swinging on the gallows pole .
" I am wandering through the centuries and waiting to one day meet up with my Father who is time traveling in a machine that brought him to this planet
And I know that from your aura that you are from another time and I need to know how you got here as I`m sure there is a connection to you and my father
"I`m afraid I don`t know your father and as how I got here the thing that got me into this mess is at the bottom of the swamp
I see said the voice , then we must come to some arrangement that if I get you free you will get the machine out of the swamp .
I guess its a deal" said Colin , thinking to himself that he has made a deal with the Devil and he still will only be able three chord blues songs
"We have a deal then, you will be set free tomorrow I swear on it "
And the Fox slowly disappeared into the darkness
That same night the the Witch finder general of the town of Stavelegh was visited by a beast that was the size of a great bear and as he wrote in his diary many years later the face of the Devil himself
The creature spoke to him
The two you hold in your stocks are innocents and if you commit them to the gallows you will find your self with pleasure of my company and you will burn in hell for all eternity
He was up at the crack of dawn the next day and skipped breakfast and made his way to the stocks on his fastest steed
The next morning Colin awoke to find a small crowd and the Witch Finder in front of him .
He spoke to the crowd.
"To see if they are not Witches we shall do the an alternative to the Pricking test and we shall kick the men on trail in there groins and if they feel pain they are free to go "
The crowd all sighed as it was as sure as anything this test had never found a man to be a witch yet .
Colin did`nt know what was best plead for mercy and not have his groin tested or just pray that the Groin kicker was not big footed
Walter was first .
Walter still half asleep screamed at the sight of a tall six foot man coming towards him and then screamed some more when the test was over
"Let him free" said the Witchfinder
The tears rolled down Walters cheeks and a faint mummy was heard by the disappointed crowd
Next up was Colin
He tried to think of something nice and far away , but the pain from his kicking brought him up to speed that he was not going to think of anything but pain between his legs for a few hours
Colin screamed then winced as was also let free and he fell to the floor
The disappointed crowd began to slowly walk down the hill muttering about the groin test should never be used on men as it always ended in a early finish in the Witch hanging events
The Ye Burger cart man , decided to have a day off and locked up and went off down the hill .
Colin could have sworn it said at the back of the cart
" No dead Goats are left in the cart over night "
He must have imagined it with the pain still making his eyes water
The Witch Finder sighed in relief that he did`nt loose the faith of his followers by just letting the men go and knew that the groin test never failed .
After the men had finally come round from the groin test Walter opened Walters cage and pulled out a hankie from his pocket , licked it and started to wipe the tar off Waters wings and soon the Pigeon manged to flap his wings and make a coo to let Water know he was well enough to do his own preening .
"What next ?" asked Walter
"If we don`t get the Shed out of the swamp we are stuck here for good" said Colin who did`nt think it would be a good time to tell Walter of his conversation with a green eyed Fox .
We need to get ropes and horses and that is`nt going to be that simple , we will have to either steal them , which in these times is not a good idea as we could end up in the stocks again or find jobs and earn enough money to buy what we need
"It`s jobs then " said Walter who was`nt keen on going through another groin test any time soon
They decided they would be better off splitting up as so not to attract any more attention as they both were strangers in these parts and that they would meet at the crossroads every three days to see if they could get the Shed out of the swamp with the tools they could gather and even though it was the dark ages tools still had to be bought and jobs were not easy to come by .
Weeks turned into Months and Months turned into years as much as they tried there was no chance of getting the Shed out without at least two horses and for the poor folk , they were just seen at Kings and Queens parades .
Colin had settled down in Stavelegh and found himself to be a good roofer and became known as Colin Thatcher
He worked tirelessly through the days up on roofs and then one particular hot day a woman walked by she was carrying a pitch of water .
"Would you like a drink sire ?" she asked Coiln
Colin was already half way down his ladder , the woman had long platted blonde hair and emerald green eyes and dressed in a flowing dress of velvet green
"Yes , thank you , have I seen you before ?, I`m sure we`ve met " Colin could`nt really believe that he would forget anyone as angelic and beautiful as this woman "
"We have spoken once "
"I`m sure I would have remembered , but I see so many people in my work , I guess I must have been on a roof somewhere " Coiln drank from the Pitch and gave the woman back the cup
"Maybe so , I bid you good day " and she walked off down the road
Each day Colin would be distracted by people passing by down as he worked on the roof , hoping the woman would pass by again
He had almost finished the roof and he was for sure he would`nt see the woman again and on the last day she appeared
"How much do you charge for roofs , as mine has almost been blown away by the storm we had last night "
" Oh.., I`m very cheap ..A storm last night, was there ? .. Yes I`m cheap !"
`Well would you work on my roof then ?" she asked with a smile
"Of course , I can start right away ! ...And you are ?"
"Annora "
"Annora , I`m Colin and where is your home ?"
"I live on Matley lane , next to the Rising Moon tavern , number 23 " she said .
"See you in the morning " And Colin skipped home
It took Colin weeks to fix Annora`s roof and he would tell her not to worry about the money and he would always finish early before sunset and ask Annora if she would like to take a walk with him
They became lovers and they eventually married and Coiln was the happiest he`d ever been in his life , he had forgotten about his past or even his future life , for the first time in his life he was a contented man .
And he also completely forgotten about his meetings with Walter .
Walter had found himself in Hide (Olde Hyde )
The town was a mining area and there was always jobs for miners as was very a dangerous occupation and if it was`nt the walls caving in it was the poisonous gases down in the pits
Walter got the job as a miner as he was already equipped with his own Cannery which were used to detect the poisonous gasses albeit a Pigeon , but no one would be any wiser as most of the workers and birds would be black from head to foot with coal .
Walter turned up at the crossroads one night to find himself alone for the first time and after several weeks he gave up the long walk he had to take was shear hell when the Winter set in and he just feared that Colin may have been arrested again and hung on the Gallows
Years past by and then that day came when an accident happened in the mine and twenty three men died ( and a Pigeon ,though it was`nt reported )
Walter found himself in a graveyard , he did`nt know or even remember how he got there but the Graveyard was full of people and twenty three
fresh graves
"What`s going on here Walter " he said lifting up the cage , Walter did`nt look at all well
He walked up to a pallbearer and asked him the same question
The pallbearer seem to have not heard him and so Walter tapped him on the shoulder
His hand went straight through him
" Oh dear , I`m surrounded by ghosts !" he cried " I must be dreaming "
And he thought a slap across the face would do it , and his hand went straight through him
"Oh dear " he said
The graveyard slowly emptied and Walter was left alone with his Pigeon
the sun slowly set and the graveyard was in total darkness and then Walter thought about his last day at work
His fellow worker and neighbour on Waters Street was not feeling well as he had been sampling his new home made brew and it took a couple of pints before he decided it was drinkable
"Walter ?" he hiccuped .Could you cover for me today at the colliery I`m not feeling all to well and I need to lie down
"No problem " replied Walter and he got his coat and picked up Walter
"Thank ye sire ! , what`s the name of your Pigeon Walter ? I`ll think I`ll name my new Brew after him "
"He`s called Walter 16th " said Walter
"Walter Pigeon " said the Brewer
"Exactly that " Said Walter and he set off to the colliery
Walter then remembered he was in the mine and heard the terrible crack of the beams and the screams and total darkness
He could`nt remember getting rescued and the stark reality had sunk in
He was dead .
But he was standing in the cemetery looking at all the fresh graves and he read the temporary tombstone in front of him it read ...
Walter Pigeon R.I.P
The day Walter had died affected the timeline as he was supposed not to be in that time and not in the mine that day
The Butterfly Effect was to change things that which put the Chaos theory to it`s most chaotic as the man who should have died that day was no other than an ancestor of Mr Kite
Colin was also affected
That day of the mining disaster Colin was never the same , he became sensitive to bright light and started to see apparitions having seizures and talking about things that were from his future life of horseless cars machines that flew to different countries in a matter of hours and he would talk about that terrible day in Stalybridge and how he had to retrieve the Time Machine that was at the bottom of the swamp at Gallows Clough .
Annora was very worried and if the Witchfiders would see him in this state they would no doubt have him as demonic and surely would be carried away and hung from the gallows pole .
She decided the only thing to put things right was to get the Shed out of the swamp and so in the middle of the night she got ropes and stole two shire horses to get the Shed out of the swamp
Colin woke in the morning and found himself alone for the first time since he and Annora had been together
He instantly knew this was not like Annora not to be with him when he awoke in the morning , she was always there . Always
He got dressed and headed out and he eventually came to the crossroads and he saw a man or a apparition , he was`nt sure and he even thought he knew him
He was completely black and holding a very black cage that had inside a pile of bones .
"Quick" Said the apparition " She`s at the Gallows !" and he swung the cage and he vanished.
Colin ran for all his worth up the hill to the gallows poles and when he reached the Gallows the place was deserted except two lifeless bodies swinging from nooses and a young boy was taring them with a large brush that was as almost as big as the boy
The third noose was empty .
Colin fell to his knees and screamed
The boy stopped taring the bodies and put the brush into the tar bucket
"Are you alright sire ?" he asked
Colin looked up and the two lifeless bodies were both men
"Where is the woman ?" he asked the boy
"The Witch ?" replied
Colin wanted to strike the boy , but he controlled his anger
"Yes .. The Witch "
"It was incredible ! , in all the Witch hangings I`ve never seen anything like it , she was released from the stocks and in a flash she was gone and in her place was a Fox which bit and fought like crazy and it took five wards to restrain it and then they managed to club the creature and as it fell to the ground it had turned into a Toad !"
Colin thought of that night when he was in the Stocks of the Fox with the green eyes and a tear ran down his cheek
"Then what happened ?"
They threw the Toad into the sack and took it down to the wall of lost souls to be cemented into the wall
Colin did`nt have any more questions and the boy picked up the brush and started taring the bodies again whistling and then he began to sing
"Father did you bring me some silver
Father did you bring me some gold
What did you bring me dear father
Keep me from the gallows pole "
Colin dragged himself up off the floor and walked back down the hill and made his way to the wall of souls
It was covered in hundreds of names that had been crudely scrawled on the wall and he walked slowly along until he came to a freshly cemented part and it had a name scrawled on it
Annora Thatcher witch
Colin just looked at it and sobbed
He stood there all day and as the sun set once again behind the hills Colin heard a voice call his name
Colin looked up
"Walter !"
"It is , yes , though I`m no longer on this plain , I`m a lost soul apparently set to wander the earth for all eternity and all the other classic cliques" he chuckled "I died in a mining accident "
"I`m so sorry Walter , it`s all my fault "
"No , no don`t blame yourself , it was the Sandwhiche`s " said Walter
"My...Annora.."
"Yes , I know " said Walter "
"Do you know what happened ?"
"Yes , I have seen what happened " Replied Walter " She had gone to the swamp to get the Shed out with two horses she had stolen from a farm , but she was spotted by the Farmer who ran to get the wards
She managed to get the Shed half way out of the swamp before they found her and arrested her and put her in the stocks and ready to be hung in the morning
I went to her that night and she could see me
I told who I was and that I was from the future and we both had got stuck here
"She told she was one of the daughters of Khafre and she been wandering the Earth for centuries and she had never been so happy with you and when you became sick she hoped that if she got you into the Shed that it would cure your visions "
Colin wiped the tears from his face
"I think we best be off from this terrible place and get back to where we belong , there is no reason for me staying here any longer , my love of my life has been murdered and I guess I`ll be next, they will come for me"
"I`m a bit tired of hanging round cemeteries , there not much night life" said Walter
They went to Colin`s house and he got his block and tackle and they set off to the swamp
When they got there they could see that the Shed was almost out of the swamp on its back and the ropes were still tied around the Shed on either side .
Colin set up the pulleys from a near by tree and after an hour of blistering lifts he managed to get the Shed upright
"Well my friend , shall we go in ?" asked Colin
" I don`t think the Shed is going to be best pleased with us after leaving it in a swamp for many years " replied Walter
" It`s a Shed " said Colin "I don`t think it has a erm..a Soul "
"The Shed has apathy, you think ?"
"Lets go inside " and Colin opened the door which creaked and the they walked inside , it had a very damp smell and various creatures were wandering about on the floor
"Err..Woodlice !" said Walter
" So I think we best go to 2002 as we originally planned and go and see Mr Kite "
Colin set the machine and they both crossed their fingers
Unknown to Colin and Walter the Shed was not happy at all and as for Apathy ?!
It had been in a swamp for almost thirty years and what it really needed was a reboot and if possible a car wash that did Garden furniture
So the Shed ignored the coordin ates and went back to it`s place of being and it headed to the black hole of Cygnus
In the sixth dimension it was to the Shed like having a cosmic Sauna
It was cleansed of all the the anomalies it had come across the intense radiation , high energy protons and most importantly the woodlice , they were chewing their way through the planks of wood and this made the Shed very nervous
The treatment was OK for common all garden Shed`s , but Colin`s human brain was frying like a M1 transport cafe on a bank holiday
It was not coping to well and as for Walter he was almost forgetting the fact he was no longer alive and he was thinking when he got back he would sort out some life insurance .
But as time traveling goes it only seemed like a few minutes and they opened the Shed door and stepped into Mr Kite`s garden
"Where here !" said Colin
"Wake up Colin !!" cried Harry
Colin opened his eyes and the he uncontrollably sobbed and cried in pain
Everything that had happened to him had come back to him and he shouted out a name
"Annora !"
Lana passed him a cup of tea
They all realized that he could not go back and change things that had happened as this time around there was no Walter as he had died in that time line and the Chaos theory would be completely off its axis and the predictability would be as insane as a quote from Grouch Marks
"Time flies like a Arrow , fruit flies like a banana "
So they put there heads together and the plan was that when Colin and Walter climbed into the back garden of Kite in 2001 , Colin`s phone would ring and it would be Colin from the future , as in 2031 and he would leave himself a voice mail telling himself to not go in the Shed as it would not only end up with the death of Walter but his beautiful wife for almost thirty years at the hands of witch hunters .
He must walk away .
So Kite got in the Shed and went to 2002 and waited for Colin and Walters arrival and he sent the Voicemail to Colin`s phone and then went back to 2031 and thankfully the Shed behaved itself ( maybe because of it`s Valet and re vamp it was a happy Shed )
So that very night when Colin and Water ( and Walter ) met under the tree and climbed into the garden , Colin`s phone beeped
"What`s that !" asked Walter
"It`s a voicemail " said Colin
And he listened to it
Colin was white when he put the phone back into his pocket
"You look like you`ve seen a ghost " said Walter
" I tell you what , lets forget about all this nonsense , lets go and have a pint in the White House "
"It`s shut " said Walter " It`s gone eleven o clock "
"Tomorrow night then " Said Colin
The next night Colin and Walter and Walter the 16th met in the snug of the White House
"What will you have " said the barman
"A bitter for me " said Colin
"Have you any new real ales on ?" asked Walter
"Yes , we have it`s an old one from the 18th century , it`s called Walters Pigeon "
"We`ll knock me down with a feather " said Walter "I guess it`s that then "
Both men sat down and took a sip of their beers
" One thing I meant to ask you , was about the unexplained thing you brought up in that meeting last week "
What was that Walter ?"
" The Toad in the wall " one
" Oh , yes , it`s a strange one that , its just further up from Gallows Clough.
During the construction of the Deep Cutting in the 1800`s a stone mason split a piece of stone and he discovered an outline of a Toad in the wall.
Very mysterious indeed as their was no evidence of bones or anything to prove there was a Toad inside , it was as though it had just disappeared
" Fascinating" said Walter " Cheers Colin !"
And both men raised there glasses to the unexplained and real ales .